Up North

I am up North at my family cottage,  I can remember counting the days to come up here, spending 2 blissful months at the cottage with my grand parents and crying when I had to home. Up north is a few steps back in time nothing much changes, all the same stores all the same people it is at its best a well kept secret that many of us grew up with,

Once I would hit the mackinaw bridge I  would get giddy, once we hit Manistique I would be jumping off the seat and then there was the road to redemption. A 2 lane road winding sown over a mile to the tesort community that was nestled just before the 2 track to our cottage. When we would hit the first bend my mom would start ZIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG, then the Next Zaaaaaaag and on and on till we had hit the row of cottages and homes against the lake. at the resort end it is where a small private road started, just past the swing set and cabin 5 and 6.  It was sand filled and when I was growing up locked by a gate that our next door neighbors had Installed with a Big KEEP OUT sign,  we could turn the engine off and roll all the way down the hill to the cottage, and park next to the garage that .was barely fitting a 1965 CJ4 Jeep that my grandpa had bought off the line in Detroit and drove all the way up north going 45 miles per hour.  Inside was luxury compared to the standards of the rentals.  We had a full kitchen, Bath, Living room, Dining room and 2 bedrooms with a Long screened in porch that over looked a lake much like you see in the movie “On Golden Pond” with Henry Fonda.  At night there was bon fires and S Mpres and by day  kids swimming at the beach,a trail lead the way all around the lake, my lake was the best because we had an Island, it was  just outside my cottage a quit trip in the canoe.  As a child this place was magical the cottage had a moth ball smell, I loved it.  Once you opened the door, to the kitchen it was an aroma you never quite forget.

There was always some family coming in with kids to play with, Show them them the finer things, and a  Picnic every 2 weeks at the resort.  Most of the time I bathed in the lake (Ivory is the only soap that floats) and my goal in life was to swim to the flags.  The flags was a Big cement block about 40 feet from shore, In order to go out to the flags where it was 9 feet deep I had to swim to the Island and back to prove I was a strong enough swimmer, Which I did at age 9.  I would run  down  to see the neighbors and fish off the docks, catch milnnows for my grandpa and dig for worns for him to trout fish with.

In town we would go to Lake Michigan, do laundry at King Koin and be a local summer resident.    We ate at Jax for lunch and Sunny shores for breakfast because that is just what you did.  I grew up with a free rein at the cottage, knowing every summer was filled with sun, water and new and old friends that were returning. 

As I grew up it started to change, I became more reclusive, and would go to Octopus point (named after a tree that fell down and had its roots stretched out like an octopus) and write in my journal, thoughts hopes and poetry.  I had my first kiss playing poker with Andy, whom I had known for 10 summers. We had feasted On Spaghettos,  Played House, and fished together all those years.  That was the last year Andy and I got to hang out, The resort was sold off piece by piece and some friends bought a few of the cottages, But most did not have enough time to spend up here to warrant buying one.  the tiny cottages were a steal, but they gave little comfort and most have been rebuilt, Bedrooms and kitchens remodeled and the outside painted or re-sided.  Downtown has changed to,  all the places I mentioned have closed, and a few new places have popped up like a Pamida and a Family Dollar.  I used to come up for the 4th of July,  and due to the whole family being up here I would get a room in town at the Harbor Inn.  It was a Little motel just at the edge of town, back in the day when family squabbles were not an issue.  I was the baby, so I kept quiet mostly.  I had a room for me and my cat and who ever came up with me that year.  there was a big crack outside of the rooms in the parking lot that my Brother in law renamed a Babbling brook due to rain one day. The owner hated cats, but still wanted My money enough to let me stay.  It was 4 days of Family outings, Picnics, Golf and swimming, not to forget drinking and S mores for all.  But that to has changed.

The last few years, I have become a chauffer, a care taker and a craft Technician.  I am Building things with popsicle sticks, Swimming with my son and doing chemo treatments for my mom.  I am cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, and picking up the cottage as if I had company coming over any minute.  I am stuck in the world of yesterday, Where at the bridge, My Brand new Adroid Died and lost all signal and the DISH system my Brother gets leaves me bored and craving a internet connection, So much that It hopefully will be here tomorrow.  I Broke and I called to have it installed, at the cottage that did not even have electric in it when It was Built, will have DSL in 24 hours.  I cannot cope, I miss people, I truly do and being the End all of everything, I need a break, I need to attempt to keep my EA score up or at least back up, and I need to talk to, Well , Him. 

I have not been able to get out a single Poem, Nothing worth blogging about, I cannot focus, I do not care, I am just to stressed to even think about it.  writing poetry  takes emotion and compassion, I have none right now, I am just empty, Tired and in need of a break from everyone.  I have a feeling that once I am back, I will have already lost, I will have nothing to come back to, But I guess I am willing to try at least.  So tomorrow when I can connect the first thing I am going to do is post this Blog,  If I can get on the Wifi from my phone I will even add Pictures. But for now it is late, My ambiean is kicking in and I have to sleep, Till tomorrow when my popsicle house needs to be set, and when my son is ready to swim when there is breakfast dishes to do and then my moms 2 chemo treatments a day, Sometime in there I will have a connection, Slow at best, but enough to get email, IMs and Empire avenue..  Good night to you all, Hugs