So my page has been full of a pissing match of sorts. Amazing how you can get pulled into stuff with nothing to do with it. I have an opinion, and well, with my blog going a year now, I have never been shy to share it. Some people are not as controlled as myself, they write with pure adrenaline and emotion… I am so tempted to share the comment that was posted, But I am trying to keep this person, who feels the need to transfer hate to me, and play the victim of sorts safe from their own doing.
I blocked their IP for a bit, thinking maybe they Needed a break from rereading my blogs over and over again, Just stirring the fire, the hate and the rage.
Funny thing, a lot of my blogs are about hurt feelings, Being discounted and losing what you wanted….. I seriously doubt they read any of those. But it is ok, acceptance comes in time, and honestly I have learned the hard way, time does heal all wounds, and even sometimes you can progress from the healing.
2010 has had ups and downs like every year. I am in the very least lucky, and at the very most blessed with anyone I was able to connect to this year. It did not come and go without pain, Nah, no year does. But it is what you do with that pain that has helped me grow as a person. I did a blog a while back called what A girl wants. It was quite amusing and stayed as the top read bog for quite a time, It was actually very heart felt in my own sense of humors way. It was what dudes do wrong in a relationship that piss me off. I was in a cocky fun mood but wanted to get a point across. I think I did and just before that, I had gone to a very dark place, one of pain, loneliness and despair.
It was with that I think I grew as a person, I strived to be different. Ok so I don’t offer out my emotions as a option on the tray of life often, But I do have them, I just keep them very protected. Using the L word with me is not going to work after a short time, My age old saying of Action talks, Bull shit walks is more my style. If you feel the need to say it, make sure the actions behind it apply or you need to move onto the next weaker version of me.
Talking to an old friend the other day was pleasant, We are friendly now, the occasional catch up, how are you. I stated that I was friends with all of my Xs at this point. They laughed and said I was the exception, they are not friends with any. They stated I was different than most, and that I was not basically the exception to the rule, But I was my own rule in itself. He stated that of all his Xs, even though we did not last (Still Wondering if we were Ever really together so New to SL) nor did it last long, I was one of the few that made him Nervous with energy. *Laughs* I look back at those days In Secondlife as exploring… That is what we did, we grabbed Misc sims and went, we did hunts we worked In clubs and we hung as a group.
Lastly I stated that it seemed a lot less bullshit back then, I mean it was a group of maybe 10 of us, all together. we were like a Lil family who maybe moved out of state, lost touch, and really parted on not bad terms just different interests. Time has its ways of bringing things back together, Back in a full circle. 2 or 3 of those people have quit SL but I am talking to all that are online now. If only I had the time to be there and get us all together at the same time. Soon.
The beginning of a new year and taking the old and grabbing the lessons learned, It is allowing the bad to make you stronger and the good to carry with you as a reminder that no matter how bad, meek and desolate it looks, there is another place to be. Nothing bad happens without a lesson learned, But only if you allow yourself to be open enough to learn that lesson, I was blessed with someone who taught me this, Not through telling me but through showing me. I am honored to say he is still my friend to this day and apparently still protective of my heart and soul. Thank You Jersey….
In closing, I wish everyone a productive year, May your smiles be catchy by unsuspecting sadness in another. My your hand be a beacon of hope, May the offer of a virtual hug be accepted with friendship, love and care and may each decision you make renew your drive to be a better person this year and always
Ok, I need to go Beat on My XBox again…. a Lil Kinect boxing is calling.. Hugs!
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